Still Waiting

I think I'm very much a beginner at all of this.  I have no idea how my cycle usually works, when I O, or how long form my O my period starts.  I should be starting any day according to how long my cycles usually last.  From when I went off the pill in Feb they've been a pretty consistent 33-38 days apart.  And today is day 36.  I took a test and got the faintest of faint little blue lines that I probably just imagined, but I swear I saw something.  So I went out and bought another test and of course it was negative.  But maybe I O'd late or it took the longest amount of days it could take to implant or something.  I counted and if everything was just a little late I'd only be around  or 7 DPO even though my period is late or a few days away.  But maybe I'm just creating every possible scenerio to be pregnant.  More and more I'm having physical reactions to the thought of not being pregnant.  I just found out a girl that works closely with me is pregnant.  She said she didn't want to tell me because she knows we're trying and that I might be and she was waiting to tell me once she found out I was too.  It could have been months and months that she waited.  I would've found out eventually!  It's true what people say.  Once you are trying or thinking about having a baby, EVERYONE around you gets pregnant or finally has their baby, or you just run into pregnant women on the street everywhere you go.  It's inescapable!  I'm even in prenatal massage right now in school and tonight we have 6 pregnant women coming to do our finals on.  And I have to touch her!  It'll be hard to be massaging someone else's baby in their stomach.  Maybe it'll rub off on me though.  But I still don't know for sure if I am or not.  I guess until my period comes I can still hope.