Delayed post from April

We had our big ultrasound scan yesterday and everything looks happy and healthy! My friend was the tech who did our scan so she told me that she saw something that was probably nothing but wasn't usually there, so I printed out the report this morning and the radiologist said it was just an extra like sac of amniotic fluid.  I think it might of been from the twin that we lost.  Either way, it's nothing and I'm so glad he's right on track in there!  I can't believe I might get to meet this little baby in the amount of time I've already been pregnant.  Hopefully he's not earlier than 2 weeks, but he can come when he wants, early or late.  And early only so long as he's completely finished cooking lol.  I can't wait to meet him.  I can feel him moving so much now and I love it!  When I'm lying in bed I'll feel him roll and my tummy will get hard on one side and then he'll roll again and it'll go soft.  He's super active and kicks, which both my husband and I can feel on the outside.  Me more than him because obviously I'm there more often and get an inside perspective, but he's felt him kick a few times.  I can't wait till we can play with him in there and really feel and see him moving.  It's the craziest most miraculous thing that's ever happened to me, physically and emotionally.  I don't know how I can love someone I've never met so much already.

On another note, we're moving in a month so I ned to start packing!  I won't be able to do the quick pack and unpack like I usually do this time.  I'm excited to finally have a room for the baby so I can start feeling like I'm getting ready.  We'll order his furniture soon and then I want to make the crib skirt and blankets that he'll use.  I also want to sew some cute fabrics onto the fronts of our plain white burp cloths.  I'm not really artsy or crafty, but I've found tons of stuff online that makes it look super easy, so I'm excited!  And a friend of mine is letting me come over and pick through all of her boy clothes.  Her son never even wore his newborn stuff because he was so big, so it's all like new, and she's kept them all for the last 4 years.  It was meant to be :)

I'm off to take my next set of belly pictures, so I have to go get ready!!

I guess it's about time for an update.  I have no idea why I go so far in between posts, but it's easy to do.     So, I'm 38 weeks and 5 days pregnant.  Everyday that gets closer to meeting my baby feels like a million years.  I know he's not ready to come out, and I LOVE being pregnant, but my impatience is starting to come out.  I'm just so ready to meet him and feel him in my arms from the outside.  It is bittersweet though.  Even though God has blessed us with this baby, I can't help but wonder if this will be the only and last time I get to be pregnant like this.  It makes me not ever want it to end.  I'll miss the tummy and being the only one who gets to know him and feel him move around.  I hope it happens again for us, but you just never know.  It's sad to think I wouldn't be able to ever experience this again. But at the same time, I'm so thankful for this little boy and I'm anxious to get to the next phase of watching him grow!  I can already tell he's going to be active since he never ever stops moving, even with his complete lack of room in there!  But I think it's close.  3 weeks ago I was dilated to a 1 and 50% effaced, and 1 week ago I was dilated to a 3 and 80% effaced.  I lost my mucous plug a few days ago and have noticed a lot more contractions since then, but none of them painful or anything.  He moves around during them and that's probably the most uncomfortable part.  He'll come out when he's ready and I'm completely ok with that though.  I've been off work for a little over 2 weeks now and it's nice to sit all day and put my feet up and feel everything he's doing.  I know the crying will be here soon, so I'm just enjoying the quiet :)  But I'm ready!

The time is going by SO fast!  I forget to update on here, and I've been horrible about keeping a pregnancy journal.  I know one day I'll forget, but it's hard to imagine being able to forget everything that's been happening to me.  I love my little guy more and more everyday!  He's already the best thing to ever happen to me and he's not even here yet.  I'm starting to get really uncomfortable, but it's a small price to pay.  If I stand or sit too long I start feeling a lot of stretching in my back and lower abdomen and it makes it difficult to catch my breath.  But I'm trying to walk a lot more and it seems to be helping me sleep at least.  Or what little I can anyways.  It's hard to imagine how the next 11 weeks will go.  I can't imagine getting any bigger and how that will feel.  But I love watching my belly grow and seeing him move.  He likes to press as hard as he can against me and it can get uncomfortable, but it makes me laugh when I feel it.  It's like I can sense his personality already and he seems very playful.  He usually kicks back if we poke him or move my tummy around.  And unless he sleeps at night, which I wouldn't know since I'm asleep, he never sleeps!  He's up all day and moving around.  Or he at least sleeps for very very short periods of time.  I guess I won't know till he's finally here.  But I'm so excited to meet him and see what he looks like.  I know the time will go fast.  I'm starting to sense how hard it'll be to do this in the middle of the summer though!  It's barely in the 90's and I'm not even that big yet and  already feel like I'm barely going to make it.  But I'm planning on spending a lot of time in the pool!  And I can't wait to start getting his room ready.  His crib's put up, but we still need to paint all of his furniture and then after the shower I can start seeing what I need and put things together.  It'll be fun to see it all coming together.  And hopefully soon I'll be working less hours so I can come home and take naps in the afternoon and not have to sit so long all day.    

21 weeks tomorrow!!  I'm still in amazement everyday.  He's already the love of my life and I haven't even met him yet.  He moves so much now and kicks really hard!  We can feel him from he outside and see my tummy bouncing every time.  It's the neatest feeling ever.  And things are really progressing on the supply side.  We have our stroller and carseat, and my in laws said they'd buy his crib.  We have an armoire, toy chest, dresser and book shelf that Brian is going to paint white for me so we have all of his furniture!  And we went to a big consignment event this last weekend and got tons of stuff for him.  Lots of cute little gowns, my nursing pillow, and some other cute stuff.  I feel like he's really really coming now.  I love feeling him everyday.  It's the most constant reassurance.  We go back of another ultrasound in 5 weeks, and then we'll have one at 30 weeks for measurements, and then another 4D scan sometime around 32 weeks.  We're already signed up for our birthing classes and I can't wait to take a tour of the hospital and see where this little boy will make his official way into the world.  I finally look unquestionably pregnant so that's been nice.  It'll be a few more weeks I think before people start randomly asking me about it lol.  But until then, I love having him to myself everyday :)

We had our big ultrasound scan yesterday and everything looks happy and healthy! My friend was the tech who did our scan so she told me that she saw something that was probably nothing but wasn't usually there, so I printed out the report this morning and the radiologist said it was just an extra like sac of amniotic fluid.  I think it might of been from the twin that we lost.  Either way, it's nothing and I'm so glad he's right on track in there!  I can't believe I might get to meet this little baby in the amount of time I've already been pregnant.  Hopefully he's not earlier than 2 weeks, but he can come when he wants, early or late.  And early only so long as he's completely finished cooking lol.  I can't wait to meet him.  I can feel him moving so much now and I love it!  When I'm lying in bed I'll feel him roll and my tummy will get hard on one side and then he'll roll again and it'll go soft.  He's super active and kicks, which both my husband and I can feel on the outside.  Me more than him because obviously I'm there more often and get an inside perspective, but he's felt him kick a few times.  I can't wait till we can play with him in there and really feel and see him moving.  It's the craziest most miraculous thing that's ever happened to me, physically and emotionally.  I don't know how I can love someone I've never met so much already.

On another note, we're moving in a month so I ned to start packing!  I won't be able to do the quick pack and unpack like I usually do this time.  I'm excited to finally have a room for the baby so I can start feeling like I'm getting ready.  We'll order his furniture soon and then I want to make the crib skirt and blankets that he'll use.  I also want to sew some cute fabrics onto the fronts of our plain white burp cloths.  I'm not really artsy or crafty, but I've found tons of stuff online that makes it look super easy, so I'm excited!  And a friend of mine is letting me come over and pick through all of her boy clothes.  Her son never even wore his newborn stuff because he was so big, so it's all like new, and she's kept them all for the last 4 years.  It was meant to be :)

I'm off to take my next set of belly pictures, so I have to go get ready!!

Here's my 2 favorite pics from yesterday :) He sleeps just like his daddy with his hands near his face.  But he always has them there!  And I'm completely obsessed with his itty bitty toes and feet <3

I can't believe my sweet little boy is almost 18 weeks.  It feels like every day is going so slow, but the weeks are going by so fast.  We haven't even started getting ready at all and he'll be here before we know it!  We had our 4D ultrasound on Saturday and our parents got to come and see him with us.  He still looks tiny and not at all ready to come into the world obviously, but it made me just that much more anxious to meet him and hold him and kiss all over him!  No matter how far we get, I'll always have the fear in the back of my mind that he still can get taken away from me.  I try not to think about it, but for anyone who's gone through infertility I think they can understand.  It's just so much disappointment and so even when something good finally happens, that expectation for something bad to happen is still there.  The thought that this can't possibly be happening to me.  But everyday I let myself love this little boy more and more.  It's scary and exciting all at once.  Brian got to feel him kick the other night.  He put his ear to my belly where I was feeling it and without me telling him, he could pick out the kicks from just the general moving.  It was the neatest thing I've ever felt.  And I'm so glad that he's able to be such a physical part of this so early on.  The tech said I have a posterior placenta, so that's probably why I can feel him so much already.  I love feeling him.  I'll be sad when he's not in there anymore for me to always have with me.  But I'd much rather have him out and in my arms :)  We have our 20 week ultrasound on Wednesday.  We're doing it at 18, but the doctor said that was fine.  So we'll know if he's healthy and air everything's going how it should by Friday.  I can't wait to see him again!

I forgot to upload these!   They're from a just for fun scan I did on Monday :)  The face is kinda scary looking, but I know he'll be cute when he comes out!

I'm 16 weeks today and it is going really great so far!  I've been feeling the baby move since 14 weeks and I love it!  I had an ultrasound for fun at 14 1/2 weeks at work and we found out we're having a little boy!!  We both wanted a boy first so we're super excited :) I'm still losing weight but my belly is growing and the doctor doesn't seem worried at all.  So hopefully I actually start seeing some weight gain soon.  I've been sleeping not very well.  Part of it I'm sure is that I just can't seem to turn my mind off.  I feel like there's a million things I need and want to do, but we're not really far enough for me to justify doing anything.  I figure at our 20 week mark I'll feel more ready.  We're moving so the baby will actually have his own room that I can put things in and get ready.  I'm just still in disbelief that this is happening to me.  It's amazing and I love seeing and feeling the changes in my body as it gets further.  He's already a very active little boy, and always measures bigger then he is.  So we may have him before our due date which I wouldn't mind at all! But he can stay in there as long as he wants.  I won't kick him out :) Ok, I need to go eat!

I'll be 14 weeks on Wednesday!  I honestly never thought I'd get to this point.  It's amazing and crazy and scary and nerve wracking all at the same time.  I'm getting to that point where I'm admitting to myself that it's really going to happen.  It took awhile, but I see my baby as a baby now.  Which I love!!  We've been lucky and had several ultrasounds, and some girls at whorl scanned me twice.  The baby moves around so much and I'm pretty sure at our 12 week scan we saw some little boy parts.  Our doctor wouldn't say anything, but there was definitely something there, regardless of what it is lol. I'm hoping for a boy so maybe it was just my wishful thinking.

I'm feeling way better than I did a few weeks ago.  From 4 weeks till right after 12 weeks I was sick all the time and so SO tired!  I'm still tired but some of my energy's back and I can feel my appetite coming back.  I lost around 5 pounds the between 4 and 12 weeks, and put it all back on in the last 2.  My chest has been tender but not painful, and it seems like they're finally starting to grow!  Which I'm very happy about.  And because I haven't really gained any weight everything is showing pretty much only in my tummy.  I woke up a few days before 13 weeks and it was just there.  I'm in maternity clothes all the time now which are super comfy and have made my life so much better!  I can't wait until I'm at that point where I'm obviously pregnant though.  I'm still stuck in that stage where I could or could not be and people would be afraid to ask.  I think I'm only a few weeks away from that though.  It seems to be sticking out more and more now.

And in 3 1/2 weeks we find out if it's a boy or girl!  I scheduled a 4D ultrasound and our parents are going to come with us and find out too.  I'm excited to see the baby again and for all of our parents to see.  It's really the most amazing thing I've ever seen.  Especially in 4D.  It's going to be so weird to see its face and all of the details of its body.  I can't wait!!

I finally have a massage scheduled with my friend for Thursday.  I am in serious need of one.  My back has been hurting so bad and I haven't been sleeping very well.  But I'm going to see my friend once a week so I'm hoping that it helps.  It should, or at least make me more relaxed.  I've been beyond irritable lately.  And I can see it just getting worse as I get more and more uncomfortable.  But you never know.  :)

It's been a little while but things are still going really well! There's only one baby now, which is fine, and it's big and healthy and measuring a day further than we are. I had my third appt today and got to see the baby! It had arms and legs and we could even see it moving around and kicking. So crazy! I'm 10 weeks today and we go back in 2 weeks just to keep an eye out hat the baby we lost is doing what it's supposed to and not causing any problems for the other baby. So anyways, that's where we're at! I've been really sick the last week. The whole pregnancy I've been sick but it's been worse lately. I'm hoping it means the baby was going through a growth spurt :) ok, more later!